Match.com stats:

Total profile views: 1468 (33 since yesterday)

New received emails: 0

New winks: 0

Optimism level: Maybe I’d find more matches if I browsed profiles drunk.

My blogs have been so long the last few days I haven’t had a chance to mention that I put a profile up at Date.com to check out their scene. I’m not quite sure what the purpose of Date.com is since at least half the emails and interests (same as Match “winks”) have come from people who live in other states or countries. Maybe they’re looking for “Reech wooman to bring me to Amedeeka.” I couldn’t help but notice that the farther away they’re located the hotter their pictures. Certainly makes me question the legitimacy of the site or at least the people on it.

Date.com offers instant messaging and if you miss any IM’s, they’ll email the text to you. I had a very bizarre incident the other day when I found this missed IM in my mailbox:

I am in LOVE with your face.
really
I will not quit
Words from your face will make me happy
talk to me
please
I’ll wait
until i die
forever and ever
your’s is the nicest face in the whole world
PLEASE talk with me

Oh great, John Hinckley Jr. found my profile. As I was reading the note, an IM popped up from him. Curiosity got the best of me and I had to open it. The IM featured live video footage of the guy as he wrote me. I sure wouldn’t want to be on video camera. One of the perks to online dating is the potential to meet guys while looking my scruffiest. I asked him if his first IM was some kind of joke. I don’t remember what he said but I told him something like: Your IM was a bit intense. I’m not sure if that’s the best approach for meeting a woman but good luck. Then I logged out of the site before he could respond. The next morning I found these missed IM’s from him:

12/13/2005 3:13 AM
fine
then you will end up with a asshole
fuck you
DUMMY
morons a plenty
goodnight

12/13/2005 3:22 AM
Baby?
Please
I want to talk with the person behind the FACE.
FUCKING GIVE ME A BREAK
the kids you are talking to are stupid
that’s how girls like you go down
sad
but true
die alone with morons

12/13/2005 3:33 AM
such a nice face
such a tiny brain
sad

As psychotic as his messages were, they reinforced my belief that the way to get guys to respond to my emails is to shoot them down. The prankster in me is tempted to send a few guys emails that say, “Fuck you dummy.” I’d probably have men begging for my love. By the way, I wrote to Date.com and pasted the text of his message. They informed me that I can block messages from certain members but didn’t show the slightest bit of concern that one of their members is using their service to wish me death. Classy company. My assessment of Date.com: I didn’t find any desirable men through several searches and I’m inclined to believe most of the people are just looking for cybersex. Or in this guy’s case, possibly victims.

So why am I even looking at other dating sites when I’ve barely made an effort on Match? Because I’m not finding anybody who really excites me on Match. I’m tired of reading about all the countries a guy’s travelled to or the books he’s read or his favorite sports. None of that really matters to me. I need some personality. Just a hint is all I’m asking. The guys I’ve found with potential all live at least a half an hour away so I’m definitely waiting until after the holidays to approach any of them.

I’ve never sent out a wink before, mostly because I don’t respond to winks so I don’t expect others will either. But in the last few days, I’ve read several articles in which a wink led to a meeting. There are some guys who seem interesting but I’d probably never write to them because of differences they listed on their profile, such as a religious affiliation or a desire to “someday” have kids. So I’m considering sending these guys winks just to see if I get any sort of response. Should I do it?