Match.com stats:

Total profile views: 1840 (12 since yesterday)

New received emails: 1 unsolicited, 1 solicited

New sent emails: 1 new, 1 reply

New winks: 1

Optimism level: Interestingly, I think this whole process is making me LOSE interest in meeting a guy right now.

SENT EMAIL OF THE DAY: This guy viewed my profile the first or second day I was on Match but never wrote me. He’s pretty cute in his main picture so I’m sure I checked out his profile but for some reason I don’t recall, he didn’t appeal to me at the time. A week or two ago, I stumbled across his profile again and apparently he’d made some changes because now he sounds awesome. He added some very funny pictures. One is just a shot of a banana hanging out of a pants pocket (thus earning him the name Banana Man). Alone, that picture might have seemed lame or icky but the other pictures help explain his sense of humor. It seems that when it comes to humor in profiles or emails, you really have to give a few examples because just one can easily be misinterpreted. He showed good personality in his essay and it appears we’re somewhat compatible in other areas so I shot him a letter. Composing the email to him was actually quite easy, making me realize it’s not initial emails that are difficult to write, it’s responses that are the challenge. I haven’t heard back from Adventure Man so I’m not too optimistic that I ever will but I think Banana Man sounds even better and I was pretty pleased with the letter I wrote so hopefully I’ll hear from him.

EMAIL #1: This guy’s photo was decent as was the lone paragraph. What I found really amusing was the last sentence of that paragraph: I think my subscription expires at midnight so you better reply fast ….or hope that I renew. It reminded me of all the guys who scramble to find a woman just as the bar’s closing. It’s 2 am, the bouncers are ushering everybody out and these guys are working every last angle. This guy wasn’t going to let a lousy eight hours left on his subscription stop him from finding someone special (and/or desperate). I particularly liked the aggressive used-car sales pitch, “Act fast- guys like these won’t last long!” Fortunately for me, his profile says he “definitely” wants kids so the pressure was off. Moved to folder: Sorry Cinderella.

EMAIL REPLY: As expected, I got a response from George Costanza, two actually. The second one said: Hello there I saw you are online and just wanted to pop a hello to you I’m trying to get past my aversion to excessive emoticons, so I’m letting that slide. When he sent this, I’d actually been logged out for over an hour. Apparently the people using just one profile don’t realize that Match often shows you as being online long after you’ve signed off. I guess it’s Match’s attempt to make it seem like there are tons of available singles online and anxiously awaiting your email. I’ve noticed most of the winks I’ve received come within an hour or two of being logged on.

Costanza’s first email today was surprisingly long but again, he had great personality. He basically said he only likes one round of emails and then it should go to IM or phone and left me his phone number. While I’d probably prefer IM to phone, it’s been so long since I’ve done it, I’d have to open a messenger account somewhere and that’s just way too much trouble for someone I’ve never met. I think I’ll write him back tomorrow and lob the “let’s meet and get it over with” volley to him.